fastingfromsexforoneyear

He is in Iraq, he is putting his life on the line.  In return I have agreed to remain faithful for a year while he is gone.  Every thing was a breeze, than I ran into that ex 2 days ago ever since it has been flashback lane.  The feelings had never changed but we had both gone down different rocky path.  My husband rescued me from my self destructive path and therapy rescued this other guy. I actually remained good friends with this ex sister and when I went to drop her off I ran into him again. I know I set myself up. He offered me his “services” and God I wanted to take him up He new I did but I didn’t.  He wanted me to look him in the eye but I new i couldn’t so I wouldn’t. It was obvious the passion between the two of us never died. I was careful because I new if I so much as kiss this guy on the lips that there would be no turning back seeing once I give in I cannot stop.  I love sex and I am the most sexual woman out there. Who would have thought that running into a guy from the past could make someone feel so vulnerable.  I fought every urge with every power i had in me and we went our separate ways.  Yet I feel guilty.  Guilty to know that I felt tempted.  Yes i didn’t do anything but yes i did want too.  How could I want too.  When did I ever get so weak.  What happened to my devotion to my Husband?  He is laying his life for our Country I owe it to him to be faithful and so far I have been.  i am just shocked that I am so desparate to be loved.  Will this longing be taken care of by my husband quick enough that our marriage isn’t thrown on the lines.  I love my Husband but he feel like a distant memory.